crooks! villains! all of them should be kicked out! they should be carried up ina helicopter and thrown overboard! without parachutes! they should be shot! crooks! papa! you get so angry! wouldn't a man get angry? but anger is notgood for your health!
you have the problemof high blood pressure! i know, i know! what's this? again youhave started to smoke the pipe! i have not started again. so why is it in your hand? it's an old habit,it will take time to get rid of! papa..- both you and yourmother have the same habit! you just keep pestering! have you taken your 'goli' (pill)?- no, i haven't.
that is why! mummy! mummy! bring the 'goli' (pill). which 'goli' (bullet)? the one for putting in a gun orthe one for putting in the stomach? is she your mother,or an executioner? she is talking about the 'goli'(pill) to be put in the stomach! the pill for blood pressure! colonel, what happened?why are you so angry? wouldn't i get angry? - calm down!
don't i teach you in yoga?take deep breaths. take deep breaths. exhale after breathingin or you will die! they are crooks! what happened?- they have teased my daughter. i am not going to spare them!- what! they did not tease me!he gave compliments to me! really? what? he said, wow!a girl as beautiful as a fairy!
of course, the daughterof a fairy would look like her! anybody who calls you a fairyhas to be either crazy or blind! you had said so before our wedding! before our wedding,i was crazy as well as blind! does she look like a fairy? can a fairy competewith my daughter? even aishwarya raiis nothing compared to her! had abhishek bachchanseen her earlier.. ..he would haveasked for her hand..
..and we would have been compelledto make amitabh our relative! i wouldn't have consented to it! i do not want theatre andfilm people as my relatives! come dear, sit, sit. even the moon feels soself-conscious on seeing her! it feels so jealous thatit keeps wandering in darkness.. ..for 15 days at a stretch! so sweet! look, look!when she smiles one crore rupees..
..get credited to her bank account! so sweet! so sweet! your papa will get diabetes! let me get diabetes!she has the cure for diabetes! really? - yes. what? - when she plants a kisshere, the diabetes will vanish! when she plants another kiss here,i will never fall sick! and by chance,if she plants third kiss here.. ..no disease will ever afflict me!
what if i kiss you? i will vanish! i will die! papa! - yes, dear? i have one very importantthing to tell you. not one,tell me two important things. tell me two important things. do you remember i had toldyou about my boyfriend rahul? rahul! what about him? at that time you hadtold me that you will decide..
..only after meeting him. so what's the problem now? he is coming to meet you now. do you mean he is cominghere right now to meet me? in fact he is already on his way. shall i go and fetch him? yes. yes, yes, why not? - yes! look, your papahas given permission! can we deny anythingto our darling daughter? no?
that's right. we can't deny anythingto our darling daughter. fetch him.dear, go and fetch rahul. i will fetch him right away, ok? very good!you have done a very good thing.. ..by inviting him to our house. good thing, my foot! i didn't want to meet him at all! you forced me to give consent!
but, sonal likes rahul very much,isn't it? for that matter,she likes dinosaurs too! so, should i marryher off to a dinosaur? why did you invite theboy if you wanted to reject him? you are an utter fool! the only difference is thatyou do not wear the fool's cap.. ..otherwise you are a fool! the present generationwill definitely do that thing.. ..for which you refuse permission!
we should make themfall in line through.. ..persuasion cajolingand sweet talk. no misunderstandingabout me should be created.. ..in our daughter'smind when i reject rahul. shall i tell you one thing?- tell me two things. do not feel offended. - why wouldi feel offended by your talk.. ..after so many years? even the thought thatsome boy will take away.. ..your daughter scares you,isn't it?
how long will you keepher under your protection? some day you will have to sendher to her in-laws' house, right? no, kanchan. i don't like the traditionof sending off a daughter.. ..to her in-laws' house! we bring up our daughter with muchlove and affection for 20 years! at the end of 20-22 years,some outsider comes.. ..uproots our prized plantand plants it in his own garden! is our daughter akind of plastic flower?
now the times have changed! all these systems must change! no, this is not right! all this is wrong! it is wrong! i do not know about right or wrong. but sonal likes rahul very much. that is the problem! till date i have fulfilled eachand every demand of our daughter! but i am not goingto yield to this demand!
i am not going to fulfill it! i will ask such difficult-to-answerquestions to rahul.. ..that our daughter will saythat she does not want to marry.. ..such a stupidand unintelligent man! then some handsome princewith henna adorned hands.. ..will come to our houseriding a nuptial palanquin. forget it. every father thinks abouthis daughter on similar lines. you are also thinkingin the same manner, isn't it? just wait and watch! i willfind a nice live-in son-in-law!
it seems that they have come! why are you so enthusiastic? who has come? rahul. has gandhi arrivedin reincarnated from.. ..to make you rush like that? come in! come in! papa, rahul has come! - he is here? i am very eager to meet him! where is rahul?
hey, why are you standing there?do come in! the ghosts and witcheswill not dare to come near you.. ..when they hearthe name of mahaveer! hey, he is reciting 'hanumanchalisa' (religious prayer)! hey, this is sonal'sfather and not a ghost! he just looks like one! come, come in! - yes, yes, enter. whom will he beatif you do not come in? yes! quiet!
hey, mister! - rahul, sir. oh, rahul, sir! rahul, rahul. - okay, rahul. rahul or whoever you are. hello, daddy! - don't callme daddy! don't call me daddy! oh! again he ran away! oh, god! he is a coward! - come here! mister, you haveaccomplished in 25 seconds.. ..what i could notin 25 years of my life!
what? - you havemade my wife tremble! stand properly! do not tremble. hey, boy! - yes, sir? do you know how muchi love my daughter? - no. but i know that ilove sonal very much. oh, wow! 25 years ago youhad uttered the same words.. ..when you had come to see me! i had heard it in the kitchenwhile making 'dhokla' (snacks). hey, enthusiastic lady! - yes?
go to kitchen and make 'dhokla.' 'dhokla' and coffee? i will have it. what? - no, i meant tosay that it's not necessary.. ..to have somethingwhen you visit them. correct. i will go down and drinktea at the street side teashop. okay, go down to thestreet side teashop.. where will you drink it?
at the street side teashop. street side teashop?! did you hear his language? - yes. you like everything! he is speaking thelingo of street urchins! hey, you talk in this lingo! do you have a job or business? i do not have a job! - did you see? refuse him!
i am doing business.- did you hear that? my monthly income is 50000.- did you hear that? and in future itis going to increase. yes, i heard it! i heard it. just earning moneydoesn't mean anything! he should have power,physical prowess. in future, suppose youand my daughter go out.. ..and if some ruffian teases her,what will you do? he ran away!
oh! speak softly!he runs away in fright! he is a coward! hey, come in! he won't do anything,he is tied up! hey, you say that i am tied up! okay, okay. actually i am a black beltand i can thrash up 4-5 boys.. ..i was going to fetch my belt. are you a black-belt? - of course. oh!
25 years ago,you were not a black-belt, okay? but i had made strong coffee.shall i make strong coffee? kanchan,do not make coffee, bring.. ..boiling hot waterand coffee powder. i will drink both together. wow! go and make nice coffee. - okay. she goes crazy wheneversomebody comes! dear, why are you standing?sit down, sit down.
hey, where did he go? did i ask you to sit down? no, sir. - so why did you sit?- sorry, sir. turn around! - okay.1, 2! 1, 2! 1, 2! 1, 2! not there! sit here! sit! sit down! sit! sit. i am glad to know thatyou possess physical prowess. thank you, sir. only physical prowessdoes not accomplish everything.
you should have brains.i will conduct your iq test. do you have iq or do youknow just how to grow hair? papa, forget about iq. dear, do not interfere. iq top ten! well, boy, answer me! - yes, sir. the distance between the earth.. ..and the moon is16000 light years. - ok. would it take one crore years toreach there if we go by rickshaw? yes.
he answers in affirmative! - yes. would it take two crore yearsif there is traffic jam on the way? yes. - so,on that basis, what is my age? 52. - what?! how smart, rahul!absolutely correct answer! how did you know? it's very simple. in my locality,there is a half-crazy man and.. ..he is 26 years old.
what do you mean?am i completely crazy? you are absolutely correct! what is correct? - your age! you are talking as ifit's true that i am crazy! of course! - what?! no, no, here is coffee. i have taken a vow tonever drink coffee in my life! really? - yes.- i brought it for him. sure, i will drink it. - what?
i did not want it to go waste! it is going waste, isn't it? - yes. it is wastage in myhouse and not in your house! let the wastage occur! offer the coffee to kashi. for kashi! - papa, he hascome here for the first time. let him have coffee!- let me have coffee! okay. kanchan,my daughter wants us to.. ..offer coffee to the poor guy!
now i don't want it! oh! i will have to drinkthe coffee made by me! had i known this,i would have made it nicely! kanchan is irritated! hey, boy! - rahul, sir. rahu or ketu, whoever you are. how much do you love my daughter? sir, i love sonal very much. i know that you love her very much.
but what can you do for her sake? i can pluck the stars from the sky! oh, wow! 25 years agowhen you had come to see me.. ..you had uttered the same words! i had heard it in the kitchenwhile making 'khandvi' (snacks)! wonderful! hey, snacks shop! - yes? if you utter another word, iwill dynamite you and your snacks! go in! go in!
he has not come hereseeking your hand.. ..so do not feel overjoyed! oh! - oh! what will you doif i refuse consent.. ..for your marriagewith my daughter? papa, why are you talking ofrefusing consent for the marriage? you are interfering!calm down! calm down! calm down! what will you do if i reject you? if i cannot marry sonal,i will drink rat poison..
..and die in this place! nowadays,it doesn't kill even the rats.. ..so how will you die? oh, please! well, never mind. i am refusingconsent to your marriage. what's this? mummy! - quiet! quiet! it's ok. dear, take this. what happened? - shoot yourself.
hey! hey, if he dies, you'll go tojail and will have to do hard labour! no problem. instead, why not accept himand do hard labour in the house? actually,it is a crime to encourage suicide. yes. - shut up! just shut up! son, it is very easy to speakbut difficult to put in action. come on, shoot!shoot yourself and die! rahul, what are you doing?are you crazy? sonal, i am not crazy, but i know..
..that we will never meet if i die. right. so it will be better ifi remove the hurdle in our path. do it. i will kill youif i cannot marry her! he is ready to kill me! i remember very well thatyou did not speak like this.. i had heard it while makingfritters in the kitchen! oh, snacks shop,if he shoots, i will die!
dear, do you wantto marry this criminal? he calls me a criminal!- papa, calm down! put it down, son! put it down! i will not look good in a whitesari at the time of your wedding. only a woman can understandhow humiliating it is.. ..for a woman to attenda wedding without wearing jewelry! crazy woman,he is ready to kill me! still you want ourdaughter to marry him? i said so to stop him!
rahul! rahul,i will never forgive you.. ..if anything happens to my papa! i had never imaginedthat you are this kind of man! okay, that means, in your life.. ..he has got moreimportance than me! careful! it will go off! sonal, then thereis no point in living! i will kill myself! no, rahul! - i will kill myself!
rahul! rahul! - i will kill myself! rahul! rahul!- i will kill myself! rahul! am i dead or alive? you idiot! you are alive! you are playing a charade!there are no bullets in this! here, put this in andthen try to shoot yourself.. ..and kill yourself if you like! what's this?- i say,this boy is very nice.
you do not need topractice rejecting him. is he a nice boy?he is a big show off! a show off! papa, do you haveany objection now? i do have objection! but what is your objection now? a very big objection! - what? what? dear, if you marry him.. ..you are not going tolive with him alone! - naturally. you will have to live with his mother,father, brothers and sisters.
obviously.- so i want to see his parents. you want to see them!i have their photo. not in a photo!- i want to meet them! do one thing,tomorrow bring them here. sonal, they won'tbe able to come tomorrow! cancel the wedding! refuse him! hey, i mean that theylive in a town in kathiawad! rotalpur. so, it will take them2-3 days to come here!
so go there and after twodays come here with your parents. thank you, daddy! he addresses me as daddy! i told you not to call me daddy! okay, sorry! sorry! thank you, papa!- anything for you, darling! by the way, colonel,how much do you love mummy? what nonsense are you asking? what! loving mummyis nonsense for you?
mummy! - colonel! kanchan,you know how much i love you! so take this revolverand shoot yourself! yes, shoot yourself! have you gone crazy? i do not need to fire a gun toprove to you how much i love you! but he was ready to shoot,wasn't he? i was ready to shoot, wasn't i? he is crazy but i am not crazy!
colonel,prove to me that you love me! prove? - yes. the proof has grown so big!look, she is wearing a cap! colonel, after that youhaven't given another proof! no! don't shoot! listen! major digvijay singh! yes, yes, i have trained him. yes. colonel suri. yes. colonel suri, do not worry.
of course i will giveyou a call if i need help! in this matter you aremore experienced than i am. right now the major will cometo see you, major digvijay singh. hand over that machine to him,do not forget it, okay? today everything depends on it. yes. no, no,they are coming today only. yeah. i am getting another call,it must be the major. yes, yes.thank you, colonel. thank you. yes, i will come andmeet you when i am free. yeah.
yes, we will sit and have drinks. ok, bye. yes, major! yes, where are you? no, no,i just talked to the colonel. go to his house andbring the machine here. how long? okay, okay, okay. they have already started. they will be arriving any moment.
it must be here beforethey arrive, okay? okay, major. over and out! sir, what are you saying? did the pakistan teamget out in one over? kashi, are you stupidor what? - but.. shut up!can 10 people get out in 6 balls? why do you speak if youdo not understand cricket? idiot! - kashi,what are you doing here? go in and do your work!
sister, you have saved me! thank you very, very, very much! what happened to him? these days he has startedto behave like this! why? - when i am talking to him,if somebody comes.. ..and asks him todo some other work.. ..he immediately sayshis thanks and leaves! - oh. day before yesterday, the colonel.. i have so much work in the house!
one minute! these days you havebeen avoiding me! come here! come here! what is it? what work do you have? guests are coming,so i have to cook, right? you are not going tocook for the guests! - so? the guests willcome and cook for us. what nonsense are you talking? how would it look if we goto see a patient in a hospital..
..and the doctor asks usto prepare 'dhokla' (snacks)? why do you connecteverything with 'dhokla?' you have blown up byeating 'dhokla' all the time! just think about it!after we marry off our daughter.. will they serve her proper food.. the population of streetdogs has increased! i will have to summon the squad! kashi, do one thing.. ..get me a toothbrushand a can of fevicol (glue).
i will brush thedogs' teeth with it! they will stop barking! rahul's parents willbe arriving any time. - so? they will be stunned to see youbrushing fevicol on dogs' teeth! let them be stunned! this time i am going tobrush it on the dogs' teeth! okay. oh, god! - mummy! wow! my dear sonal!you look so beautiful!
rahul will faint on seeing you! that is what i fear! mummy, what do you think? will papa vibe wellwith rahul's family? of course! will papa give consentfor the wedding? yes, dear.yes. do not worry at all. whatever your papa doeswill be for your good only. go inside and when i call you,
..come out blushing,carrying refreshments, ok? 25 years ago,when your papa had come to see me.. ..i too had come out blushingcarrying refreshments. times may change, but certaintraditions must not change, right? i am coming! my mummy had also taken thismuch time in opening the door. and our wedding was fixed! welcome! welcome! welcome! 25 years ago, colonel'sparents also had not come. - okay.
yours have also not come, right? oh! - have they come? father! we shouldpay the taxi driver! we should not demandmoney from him! let go of his neck! greetings! - greetings! the girl seems to be fat! what can i do if all thewomen look like girls to you? colonel will never likethis fancy dress competition!
rahul's father! - yes? this mansion is much biggerthan the bus depot of rotalpura! ask for this mansion as dowry. i will slap you! - why? asking the mansion as dowry! do you want to carrythe mansion to rotalpur? instead of that,we will ask for cash! you are absolutely right! - so! just keep quiet!
okay. - okay.- shall i introduce them? - yes. introduce us! who are they? i am not scared of anybody! introduce us! this is my father. - yes. and this is my mother. and this is my sister, daksha. and this is sonal's mummy. why do you bungle?this is the girl's mother!
father, please be seated.- okay. sit. - yes, let us sit. sit. father, do not sit here! shouldn't we sit here? - no. ok, we will sit a little ahead.sit here. how many times have i told you.. ..not to place the pitcher infront of me when i sit like this? how does it look? father, here..- i am not doing it here!
father, you are not supposedto do it here! - what? i mean you are not supposedto sit here! - what? sit over there.- oh, we have to sit there! come here. - okay, okay. let us sit here. what do you want?do you want to sit here? sit! sit! sit! sit on my lap! father! my son has childhood habit!
he must sit on mylap whenever i sit down! sit! sit! - i don't want to sit!i don't want to sit! okay. i will go andpay the taxi fare. - okay. the taxi drivers are too much! they charge money to takeyou a little distance! - yes. yes. - crooks! vandals! do you think thisis your daddy's garden? get lost!get out! get out! get out! who wants to driveme out of the house?
i will wring his neck! he is not scolding you! - huh! he is angry at the dogs. who is this crazyman who talks to animals? he is sonal's papa. oh! this one?! who are all these people? is a village fair beingorganized in our house? sister, this is not a swing,this is a chair!
why are you rocking like that? no problem.what is this? look at her! these are rahul's parents. - okay. they are his parents?!these people! hello! hello! hello! sing 'helo' (devotionalsong) later, first give me a hug. one minute! one minute! you will crush me!why are you hugging me? what is your name?
my name is jivtar. the girl rocking overthere is my daughter, daksha. daksha. - and this is my wife,bhikhi. - bhikhi. bhikhi, was given as'bhikh' (alms) to her father. when she grew up, he gaveher to me as 'bhikh' (alms). now i am wondering to whom shouldi give her as 'bhikh' (alms)? to you? - rahul's father! keep quiet!we must tell them frankly. we have come hereto build a relation!
and this is my sparrow's nest..the sparrow lays eggs in it! this is rahul. - rahul. what is your surname..title, what is your title? our title is.. forget it,you will feel embarrassed. forget it means is it asurname that will embarrass me? yes. -is it something like hathi,machchhar or mankad? all that is nothing,this is much weightier than that. really? - let me tellhim since he insists. listen!our surname is nagda (naked)!
na.. you stopped short, right? so your full nameis jivtar nagda! - nagda. my would-be son-in-law's nameis rahul jivtar nagda! - nagda. in future, will my daughterbe addressed as mrs. nagda? no, no, i will not putup with such stark nakedness! no. bhikhi's father hadobjection to nagda. but ultimately didn'tshe become nagda? rahul's father! - keep quiet!
we must tell themeverything frankly. we have come hereto build relation. don't worry, daddy, i willchange my surname after wedding. hey, you idiot! - what happened? after wedding it is thegirl's and not the boy's surname.. ..that gets changed. well, we will think about all thesepoints when we form a relation. tell me one thing. do all of you workin gujarati films?
no, we just go to watch them. do you go to watch filmswearing this type of clothes? how can we go with bare bodies? father, hadn't i askedyou to wear bush shirt? you idiot! you had toldme only to wear bush shirt! i am wearing lower garment also! ..not to smoke 'beedi'(tobacco rolled in leaf)? but you cannot controlyour urge for smoking beedi! keep quiet!
by now i would have smokedone hiding behind him! i just smoke beedi,but this great man smokes a pipe! if someone drinks poison,we should not drink poison.. ..just to compete with him! - yes. i said that to stop him! on whose side are you? my or his? i am on your side. whose side is this? -your side. then point the finger properly!
father, listen to me..- move aside! brother, i wanted totell you that.. - one minute. do you ever burp beforeeating meal? - no. do you ever tie the stringbefore putting on pajamas? only a crazy manlike you would do that! hey, why do youaddress me as brother.. ..even before the weddingof our children is fixed? if it is not, then it willget fixed! daksha, what do you say? yes, father.
move aside! - what are they doing? my son told me thatyou are in 'shena' (what). in what?i am asking are you in the army? in the army. father, 'sena' means boom!- keep quiet! he is in the army. yes, in the army. the army. what kind of salary thegovernment pays you in the army.. ..that allows you to maintainthis huge mansion and garden?
did you receivekickbacks in bofors? don't talk about bofors!don't talk about bofors! i don't like bofors! he was a colonel when he retired. in short, he used to fight battles. tell me didn't you ever gethit by a bullet in the battles? in the first war ithad got embedded in my leg. and in the kargil warit caused a three inch wound! oh, so till now, they havestruck only on the fringes.
it never struck whereit really matters! jivtar bapu, no bullethas been forged that can pierce.. ..colonel pranjeevan's heart, okay? if it has not been forged,then it will be! daksha, what do you say? yes, father! i say stop talking about warand call my daughter-in-law here! yes, call her! let us see her! we want to see her.
yes, call her, call her. sonal! come out blushing! wow! such nice cups! i am talking about daughter-in-law! wow! my daughter-in-lawis so beautiful! no, no, bhikhi!do not give any gifts! the wedding has not yet been fixed! if it is not, then it will get fixed!what's the big deal about it? yes. there is a big deal!
this wedding will not befixed until you pass the test. what do you mean? he means that our daughtersonal will be living with you. he wants to check whetheryou are good enough.. ..to be her father-in-lawand mother-in-law. correct. you will beput through various tests.. ..to check whetheryou are good enough to be.. ..father-in-law and mother-in-law. you will be assignedmarks for that.
if you score goodmarks and pass the test.. ..then we will get them married. but.. but if you score low marks,then you will fail. wedding will be cancelled! but.. hey, idiot! - yes? haven't you told thesepeople that till date.. ..i haven't appearedfor any examination? do you mean you haven'tattended school? no, i have attended school.
up to? - up to afternoon. had i appeared for examinations.. ..i would have gota better wife than bhikhi. we do not want togo through any test! let all of us go back to rotalpur! let us go! - let us go! he is.. why are you sitting and rocking? do you want this chair?we will take it to rotalpur. hey! put it down!- we can use it over there!
we don't want it, put it down! father, come here.- okay. - come here. father, i love sonalvery much. - okay. if i can't marry her then.. then you will commit suicide! you idiot!girls much better than her.. ..come to wash clothesat the pond in our village! ask me! does he keep watchinggirls while playing marbles?
father, what had i toldyou when we had left our village? that we were goingto fix your wedding. are you leaving withoutfixing my wedding.. ..and taking alongthe daughter-in-law? wouldn't it ruin my prestige? how will you lose prestige? it is i whose prestigewill be ruined. father, my life without sonal wouldbe like your life without mother! what if grandpa hadseparated you from mother?
then i would have been happy! move away! look, colonel! to me, for thesake of my son, any kind of tests.. are not acceptable!- are acceptable. well, brother, what testsdo you want to put us through? wonderful!you passed the very first test! what! what kind ofquestion-paper is it.. ..where i passed thetest without appearing for it? didn't you prove howmuch you love your family?
okay, okay,you may have proved it.. ..but many difficulttests still remain. brother, put us throughany kind of tests you like. we agree to all that. nothing is more precious tous than the happiness of our son. very good, very good.that's very good news. brother jivtar, tell me one thing. can you speak english? nowadays everybody knows english.
forget about everybody else,do you know it? i know it. speak! - what? english. - english. what nonsense? - i know that also. what nonsense? why are you worried about english? i will tell you something in gujarati,translate it into english. 'vasante mane mukkomaryo' (vasant punched me). now translate it into english.
vasant..it's very easy! vasant.. vasant.. why are you at a loss?it is vasantpanchmi (festival)! yes! why are you botheringabout english? bhikhi will speak in gujarati andyour daughter will speak in english. only the street dogswill hear it, right? uncle, my parents can'tspeak english. - okay. but i can, okay? we are not illiterate!i know very good english!
right, father? keep quiet! sit down! flaunting your english skills! are you going to stay athome because you know english? aren't you going to get married? it's a different issue thatwe can't find a match for you. we don't want totell them about it. and if you can't do thatthen communicate with gestures.. ..just like rani mukherjeedid in the film 'black.'
teacher! teacher! talk in gesture like that.- what are you saying? how would it lookif a daughter-in-law.. ..communicates with herfather-in-law with gestures? hey! - take that! instead, i will learn english. he can't.. dear, will you teach english to me? this is called good manners.
well? he kept busy in fighting wars.. ..that's why his daughteris well-mannered. and you?all your life you stayed at home. that is why this one is like this! i say these people are very nice.please give consent! all of you are co-conspirators! to our daughter,they look like a family from films. but after wedding,things will change.
isn't it my duty toworry about her welfare? oh, major! hey, shouldn't you speaksomething when you enter? you scared me! tell me what is your name?speak up! do you have a name? speak up! sister, please don'tmake him speak. - why? are you mute? speak up!speak up! what is your name?
are you mute?speak! what is your name? tell them. major digvijaysingh reporting, sir! i had warned you!you got shocked, didn't you? how did you speakin such thin voice? gargle with salt water. - yes. "oh, darling,i realised this when i saw you." "love happens to be crazy." "where do we go from here?"
"i will die in your arms." how are you? i an absolutely fine.absolutely fine. you should stop garglingwith salt water! your voice has turned masculine! tell me one thing.major, behave yourself! well, sister bhikhi! - yes? what did you findspecial in my daughter.. ..that made you chooseher as your daughter-in-law?
brother, your daughter mightbe having many good qualities.. ..but her best quality is that shewants to become our daughter-in-law! wow! well-said! hey! - not so well-said! all of you will stayhere until the tests are over. where will you stay? - here! what? kashi! - will kashi live here too? yes. is this a homeor a hotel? - yes!
kashi, all the guestswill be staying here. put their luggageinto the guest room. well sir, where is your lugg..lugg.. lugg.. lugg.. he got stuck! by now, we would have unpacked! he stutters while speaking,but he is very good at work. go on, kashi! carry the luggage. dear, serve them tea andrefreshments! go to their room. all of you have bath and get ready.
bhikhi, they havefacilities for bath too! what are you saying! it's going to be a pleasant stay!- let us go. brother jivtar! brother jivtar,listen to me. - what is it? have bath and then come down. do we play cards after that? we are not going to play cards! then will it be marbles?- we are not going to play marbles! then? - you will haveto cook for all of us.
we are the guests,do we have to cook food? and are you going tosit and enjoy the meal? i want to know whetheryou can cook or not. what if you get yourson married to my daughter.. ..and then starveher at your house? i want to know if you can cook! major! come here! he does not need a relative,he needs a cook! father, for the sake of sonal..
i will have to toleratethe thorns to pick the rose! what! where is bhikhi?- mother is inside. move aside! look! beedi (cheroot) stubs! did you see them? - yes. what do you think of them? very nice. are they nice?
they are number one crooks! they are deceiving my daughterwith their smooth talk! both of you listen. i do not want my daughterto marry their son. you have to help mein causing a break up. an astrologer had told me.. ..that i will have tospend my life with a crazy man! hey! i mean in fightingwith a crazy man!
why do you miss words? all the time,you talk like that only! listen! - okay. i have a plan,understand it properly. tonight, sonal will sleepwith you in our bedroom. i will sleep in her bedroom. did we have a fight? hey, do not interfere!this is part of the plan. did you get it? - okay.
then you will start acting.- okay, i will do proper acting. why have you startedto speak in hindi? acting is done in hindi, right? there are so manygujarati serials.. forget all that.listen, you will start acting. he will.. thank god everybody has slept! i can't even meet mysonu because of this colonel. these days,there are many cats around.
did you hear her nostril sound? she has inheritedthat from her father. sonu! sonu! you want sonu inthe middle of the night? my god! he's sleeping there.come on, rahul. run! thief! thief! thief! come out!there's a thief in the house. there's a thief.catch him! - thief! - beat him! beat him! - light!
switch on the light! call the police!call the police! - beat him! beat him! stop it! hey, he's a look-alikeof sonal's father. idiot, i'm sonal's father.nonsense! what are you doing, colonel? thief would never stealin his neighbour's house.. ..and you started thieveryin your own house?
i'm not a thief. - then who's he? you should have said that before.- how would i have? the way you peoplestarted beating me. you didn't giveme a chance to speak. the way people attackon the thief in our country.. ..if they'd start attackingon their work, our country.. ..will definitely progressand leave america behind. but why do we want to progress? but where's that thief?
yes, i don't understand.. that thief was short.. he was as short as rahul. then he must be somebody else.- yes. you're right. and one more thing. his hair.. his hairwere also curly like rahul. no, he was wearing thesame type of clothes like rahul. that means the thiefhad come to steal.. ..rahul's clothes. - yes.
you always use the wrong logic. but, where's this rahul?- i'm here. here he comes. where had you gone?- you screamed so loudly.. ..so i ran away. i mean i ran behindthe thief to catch him.. ..but he slipped from my hand. did you see his face?- did you see? i couldn't see. it was too dark.
even i didn't see.it was dark around. - thank god! what did you say? - no, papa. i mean if you hadseen that thief's face.. ..that thief would havelived with feeling of.. ..personal grudges with you. and he may havecome back to kill you. if he had done that,he'd have been killed. he was lucky that my riflewasn't there in your room. but why had you goneto sleep in sonu's room?
how did you come to know that.. ..i had gone tosleep in sonu's room? how did i come to know? am i asking youthis question or you? papa, you only said that.- what did i say? just now you said..- yes. you said..- you said.. you said..- yes, you've said. - you've said. just a minute! - wrong! all of them are lying?when they say you've said that..
..means its final.- yes, you've said. - you've said. i didn't say that. - what? did i say? - yes. kanchan, nowadaysi keep forgetting things. start eating almond pudding. he needs to be beaten. - what? who are you to beat me?come on, go and sleep now. go to your bedrooms.- come on. come on! the night is never-endingin here. - yes.
just a minute! both of you,father and a son won't sleep. we too feel sleepy. yes, you may feel sleepy.but you won't sleep. you must guard this bungalow. tell him to decide whetherhe needs a relative or a guard? mr. jivtar,why don't you understand? when my daughter will get marry.. ..i'll give her so manygolden jewelries in dowry. i must check whetheryou can protect them or not.
in short,he's going to give the jewelries. why do you botherabout the jewelries.. oh, my god! - what happened? fire! - fire! come on, everybody come out! run! mrs. kanchan!- what? - give your vote later. otherwise you'llentirely go black.. ..instead of one black spot. c'mon! everybody, let's go.- mrs. kanchan, let's go.
no! i can live without colonelbut not without my daughter. come on, otherwise you'llhave to take next birth.. ..to speak the rest ofthe dialogue. come on, run. okay, let's go. - wow! wow! stop clapping and startsprinkling water over there. brother's father-in-lawhas gone crazy. i didn't go crazy butyou people are exposed now. what? no! we're safe. - major!
come out! good work! - what's this drama? it isn't a drama.it was your test. - really? - yes. does that mean you shouldput things to fire in real? it wasn't a real fire. - what? this was your test. i wanted to check, if in futureyour house would catch fire.. ..you'd leave my daughter alone.. ..and run away, won't you?
you'll scream!daksha! bhikhi, come on, run! fail! you're failed.this alliance is canceled. no, daddy! we didn't fail.we've passed. here's your sonal. did you see this? my son saved your daughterat the sake of his own life. fool! this part of theroom had caught fire.. ..so i went behind the bungalow..
..broken the glassof your bedroom window.. ..and took out sonal. you broke that preciousglass of my precious window? forget about your window and glass. unnecessarily, you made me act. move away, flatterer. he has saved sonal.we've got such a brave son-in-law. what brave?!as if he's the only one. of course, he's brave.let me speak about my bravery.
bravery is in our blood.continuously flowing. listen to the sound of its flow.otherwise it'll be flown off. let me tell you about myself,four to five days back.. ..i was passing through the jungle. don't ask me why. i just sat there anda huge dangerous tiger.. ..came in front of me.don't ask me why. tiger saw me and i saw him. he was going to attackme and before i strangulate him..
what happened before that? i woke up. my dream was broken. with my open eyes when i saw,there wasn't any tiger.. ..but huge bhikhiwith her hair open. with long nails.- rahul's father! - keep quiet! can anybody have this long nails? she would have scratchedmy body at night. too much! too much! mad family! what does he meanby this 'too much?'
he's telling you to go to sleep. oh! let's everybody go to sleep. come on, let's go to sleep now.- it's too late. everybody go to sleep now. c'mon. mummy! mummy!- yes, son! - just a minute! yes, tell me. - thank you so much. you told me about colonel's plan. otherwise, i don't knowwhat could have happened.
you don't need to thank me.i'm a mother of a daughter. how can i afford toignore such a nice boy? now you just don't worry. i'll keep leakingall the plans of colonel. you'll keep scoring marks and.. ..colonel's bloodpressure will keep rising. mummy, turn back and say that. there's no timeto turn back and see. you just go ahead.
i tell you, also send theinvitation cards for printing. colonel may keepinsulting you for now.. ..but i promise,he'll himself feed you.. ..sweets in your marriage.it's kanchan's promise. what nonsense!traitor in your own house. very good!so nicely, you imitate his voice! teach me! teach me! all the best, mummy!- thank you! thank you! but teach me at least.
hey! he's gone. oh, god!- just turn back. i'll teach you. ok, teach me. traitor in your own house. colonel is really great.i don't understand whether.. ..he is in search ofa relative or a cleaner. how do i tell daksha's fatherthat colonel has ordered him.. ..to clean the houseas well as the garden. now how do i talk to himabout my alliance with daksha? to tell you the truth,whenever i see daksha..
..m.f. hussainstarts playing in me. no, i'm sorry.. fm 91(radio program) starts playing. i feel i'm nal and she'sdamayanti (historical character). i'm dushyant and she's myshakuntala (historical character). i'm om (film character) and she's.. shanti (film character)! "your eyes havestrange attributes." "like a kite,my heart flown away.." "..in the breezeof your heartbeat."
sorry! i've to talk to yousomething very important. i like you a lot. - same here. my god! - what happened?- you please don't talk like this. if my father hears you,he'll break your bones. i'm not scared of your father. i very well know howto catch that bull's horn.. ..and bring into control. you go inside!
female singer!what were you teaching my daughter? teach me too!come on. - okay, fine. - yes. colonel.. - first, you sit herelike this. they way i'm sitting. this way? - yes. i can't do it.- you can. just sit down. okay! now develop thehabit of doing it everyday. i'm telling you i can't do it.- come on. forcefully.. - now, tell me. you know colonel.. - yes.
he has ordered you to clean.. ..the house as well as the garden. to hell with him and his cleaning. does he think i'mhis servant? - yes. what? - i mean.. no.. papa! i tell you..you just don't worry. okay? why shouldn't i worry? henceforth,i'll do all your work. - what? you just bless me.
please,let me do some of the work.. ..otherwise you'llput me into trouble. okay! henceforth, i'll do all your work. i'll clean this houseand garden as well. and if colonel will interfere,i'll clean him too. tell this to colonel. this female singeris ready to do all my work. i'm sure somethingis fishy behind this.
i must keep a watch on him. sister bhikhi!- oh, my god.. oh, it's you? - yes. i was surprised how.. ..that female singerchanged into male? where's sister bhikhi?i've got some work with her. is it so? - yes.- i'll send her. okay? - okay. that fool is really lucky!- did you say something to me? no! no! i was praisingcolonel. bhikhi! she's practicing music. - this way?
this is her style. - okay. bhikhi, wake up! oh, god! i wish colonelleave aside these tests. otherwise we'll miss anice groom from a decent family. have you returned? what is this on your ear? from when did you developthe hobby for the music? you're playing a comedycircus audio cassette, right.. ..right..right? - why did you start singing?
i'm not interestedin a comedy circus at all. then? - this is sos machine. okay! - a machine that cancall a person from the distance. not that one. - then? sos machine means.. dr. bhabha from the armyhas invented this new machine. once you put it on your ear,it reads enemy's mind.. ..and lets you knowabout their thoughts.. ..and plans against you.
'it seems he has lost his mind.' 'i must call up tothe mental hospital.' i've lost my mind? youwant to call up in the hospital? you mean,you can really read my mind? am i joking here? 'the wrong personhas got the power!' what did you say?i've got the power? no matter how muchyou try to hide your face.. ..i'll definitely come to knowabout what's going on in your mind.
what was that? why? you can read the mind,don't you? i couldn't read this one.now tell me. fine, then i'll startspeaking in this language now. kanchan.. hey! hey! hey.. oh! oh! oh.. she has gone mad. she hasstarted behaving like a mad.. ..woman, from the daythese people have come home.
sister kanchan, did you call me? 'my god! this headache is here.' 'i hope he won't trouble me now.' sister bhikhi! it seems you oftenget the headache. and if you feel so troubled here.. ..why don't you packyour bags and leave? 'strange! how did he read my mind?' sister bhikhi..- no matter how much you try to..
..give the hint or think.i'll come to know everything. go inside. nonsense! she's calling me nonsense! again! she has become an animal. sister! - yes. tell me,what do you think about me? i mean what's youropinion about me? relative, you're great. you'rea big head. greatest soldier.
i've no words to praise you. 'frankly speaking,you look more like a joker.' 'if you join in a circus,you'll earn a lot.' sister bhikhi! - relative,why are you getting angry? i'm praising you. - i don'twant to listen to your praising. run! run! send your husband here now.- yes, i'm sending him. colonel! why are youafter my bhikhi at this age? if she loses her temper,you'll have no way out to escape.
why do you trouble her? talk to me. sit down, mr. bull. sit down, mr. jivtar. listen! - yes. why do you always sit in the room? come in the hall.we'll sit and chitchat. what to chitchat with you?you're so educated. mr. jivtar. - what's this? what have you put on your head?
it's.. it's.. it's.. - yes! it's.. - what?- it's.. it's.. music. it's a music player.- okay, a music player. it's called walkman.walkman! - what? walkman! - wal..wal.. - you can't pronounce. let it be.it's difficult. let it be. - okay. now listen! had you ever imaginedthat your son would marry.. ..into such a rich family?- no, colonel.
i had never imagined it.- i thought so. my son had proposals fromricher families than this. my son fell in lovewith your daughter.. ..and i had tocome below my status. finally, we have toaccept the groom's choice! its okay, it's okay! but, tell me one thing.. - yes? if the girl's father,i mean, i, if i were poor.. ..would you have got yourson married to my daughter?
what are you saying, colonel! money is not so important! even if you had been a pauper.. ..i would haveaccepted your daughter. 'stupid man! it is a virtuousdeed to free an innocent girl.. ..from the clutchesof a cruel father!' 'if i could, i would freesister kanchan also from this man!' i am a cruel man! yes! brother jivtar.. - yes?
what am i saying.. - yes? what do you think about my wife,i mean.. ..what do you think of kanchan? what can i thinkabout sister kanchan? sister kanchan is so good! so good! 'and you're a bulldog!i mean a beast! a beast!' bulldog! yes! why are you groaning,do you have ants in your pant? it won't do groaning like this.you have to take it off!
i was saying.. - yes. you were sayingsomething about my wife. what is your opinion about her? you know sister kanchan is so good! you must have done virtuousdeeds to get a wife like her! 'stupid! if kanchanhad met me before you..' then what? 'i would have got hermarried to a wise boy!' 'i would have givenher away in marriage..
..just as would do for my sister.' as sister! sister! yes! yes! your groaning reminds me of lakhia! who is lakhia? - my bull! bull! - why am i breakingmy head with you? you do one thing.go and prepare tea for me! what should i bring?- what can you bring? ask somebody to get it for me. why am i breaking my head with him?
i'll have to stop givingsalary to this professor doctor. this machine also didn't help. he says he has made a machineto know everyone's mind. our indigenous remedies are better! colonel suri! the same thing happened withcolonel suri and colonel pandya. i'll just find out! i'll just find out their numbers! pandya had gone to america.he must have come back!
what about my tea! sister kanchan! put extra sugar in my tea. the doctor has saidthat i have diabetes. this is colonel'smachine to hear songs! let me also hear whattype of songs colonel hears. what have to put on your ears?take it off! this is not themachine to hear songs! you can hear the otherperson's thoughts, you know?
what do you want to hear?again you've come out? listen, he has.. speak loudly,whatever you speak. - why? this is my house.i'll speak as i wish! speak as you wish but don'tspeak in your mind because he.. go inside without speaking further! she'll learn to dancebehaving like this! how are you enjoying yourself here? have this tea or coffeewhatever it is and..
..go and clean the room upstairs. 'cunning! idle fellow!he is enjoying himself in.. ..my house like a buffalo! stupid!' what sister kanchan said is right. i can hear the otherperson's thoughts. yes! now it will be fun! colonel, i was saying.. - yes? in our village, the buffalosdo and jump in the pond.. ..when they are free.
i too feel likejumping into a pond! is there any swimming pool here? 'if it would be there,wouldn't i have drowned you in it?' 'stupid hog! idiot! nonsense!' you called me ahog that i understood. but the whistlesi didn't understand! colonel, i was saying thatyesterday i observed a fast.. ..of 'ekadashi' (11th day) andtoday it is 'dwadashi' (12th day). will this hog get some sweets?
you want to eat sweets?i'll serve you, okay? i'll serve you delicious sweets! 'this joker doesn't know that.. ..i've already selecteda groom for my daughter.' 'i'm just enjoying hiscircus under the guise of test!' 'after two-three days,i'll just kick him out.' bhikhi!daksha! all of you come out! what happened? - what happened? why are you shouting like this?
what else would i do? but what is wrong? i've come to know whatthis man thinks about us! i've heard what is inhis mind with his machine. this man.. he has already fixed.. ..his daughter'smarriage with someone. he is only pretendingin front of us. i am telling the truth, bhikhi! tell me, has anyone in the village,dared to..
..talk with me loudly! - no! - no! but, rahul, for your sake,i did all that he asked me to! but he is a cunning fellow. he doesn't want to gethis daughter married to you! we'll not stay here! come! we'll go back to rotalpur!come! come! we don't want to stay here! let's go back to rotalpur! father! father!
go. go and stop him. are you mad? this is called luck! everything goes wellwhen your luck favours you! brother, pack your bagsand leave with your family! he wants to get hisson married to my daughter! move aside! - mummy, convince papa. yes. listen, listen to me. if these two part,what will happen to us? sonal, i don't understand anything!
rahul, i.. - sonal, look,i think we must tell them that.. ..we are already married! sonal, what is all this? yes, mummy, yes.we are already married. actually sonal wasgoing to tell you but.. ..i had stopped her from doing do. please mummy,now you find a way out! now, there is only one way out! just the way you married,take divorce in the same way!
no mummy,now even that is not possible. why? - because sonal is carrying! rahul! colonel,the way you have insulted me.. ..i'll surely takerevenge for that! bhikhi! how long willyou take to pack up? it's time for the train. daksha! i can't find my pant! colonel! you just waitand see what i do to you!
mind well,you are going to have it! father, take this. what is this? you foundonly the cord of the pant? i can't find it! find it. otherwise colonelwill put on my pant. mummy, you tell him.i am feeling scared to tell him. brother.. i can't find my pant. you'll find it.i want to tell you something.
i don't want to listen to anything! all our relations totalk with each other are over! whatever you want to tell me,you write it and give me. i'll go to rotalpur andask somebody to read it for me. yes! and bhikhi!how long will you take? brother, overcome youranger and take our daughter.. ..with joy and merriment. you are talking about merriment! i'm getting a severe headache!
i'm telling you frankly,if instead of your husband.. ..someone else had insulted me.. ..i would have turnedhim into a joker of the circus. you may do that.i don't mind even that. look at her. - but, i do mind it!if i turn him into a joker.. ..the joker too would be ashamed! father, don't insult my father-in-law.it doesn't look good. then what will suit you!what will suit! it will suit you if yourfather-in-law makes me dance..
..to his tunes? father, you're nottrying to understand.. leave it, son, leave it. when a person is blinded by ego.. ..he can not seethe dear ones tears. but mummy, you know thatthese relations can not end! the relation cannot end? - no! that means something is fishy! you're hiding something from me.
tell me, what is it?- mummy, you tell him. actually, rahul and sonalare already married. - what? my dear, what is all this? you keep quiet! i too amhearing it for the first time. tell me, is it true? it is true.we got married two months ago. what have you done! if you are already married,why did you bring me here? no, father..- calm down,brother jivtar, calm down and..
..think what is to be done next? now what else can we do? just the way they married,we'll get them divorced! father, i'll not divorce her. even your father will do that! hey! what wrong have i done to you? what wrong has sisterbhikhi done to you? it is the colonel who is at fault! now you stop poking you nose in it.
tell me,will you give divorce or not? otherwise i'll break your legs! that i'll not allow! you'll have to break myhead before breaking his legs! i'm talking aboutbreaking my own legs! i'll become handicap andthen both of you'll have to suffer! you to want to break your legs?i'll help you with that! then both of will goaround begging in the trains. yes, listen to the poor,he'll listen to you.
mummy, mummy, mummy.. father, please don'tblackmail emotionally. what is that? that means,the villain can't do anything.. ..if the bride and thegroom are happy with each other. villain? - that means father. then say father! i heard it wrong! i'm sorry!- we don't want to make an issue. we'll say that..rahul can not become a father!
father! on this ground,i'll never get divorce! this ground or that ground! why do you wantto go to any ground? are you going toplay football there? is there anything lackingin what you're already doing? mummy, mummy, pleasegive him the second news too. yes. i forgot totell you something. what? - it is a small matter. still there is asmall matter? - yes.
what is it?- you'll soon become a grandfather. is this a small matter? when a child is born he is small,isn't it? then it is a small matter,isn't it? and sister,you are simply watching the drama! go and persuade your husband. i'll convince him.listen, what i am saying is.. sister kanchan is right.if this children are divorced.. ..it is a question of our daughter.
it is a questionof your own grandchild. if they are divorced, the colonelwill certainly be defamed but.. ..before that we toowill lose our reputation. i accept it! i accept it! okay? he has agreed! she talks so much! i have to agree. wow! rahul, you are great! now, it will be real fun! now, i'll defame that colonel!
brother, don't do any such thing.it'll be disastrous. he may die too!- that will be the final solution! no! - father,we have hidden it from him. yes, he will feel hurt,if he comes to know. that's true.what had to happen has happened. how is this poor girl at fault? why are you coming in my way? i am not talking about you. i am talking about her.
so father,we cancel going back, right? absolutely!now, we'll stay here only! we'll stay here only! did you see sister kanchan? rahul's father does get angry,but if i convince him.. ..he listens to me! come on, now that it isdecided that we'll stay here.. ..i'll take all the bags. i'll go up and arrangeeverything there. - please go.
father, thank you very much. now we'll stay here only!we'll not go anywhere! hey, jolly one!why are you so overjoyed? have you also got married? what are you saying, father? i am delighted becausei want to dance in.. ..brother's wedding. "since your eyes met mine.." "i became crazy."
"i became aloof." "even the god seems passionate." all the pigeons flew off together. when these two come together.. ..they do nothingother than singing duets. hey! about turn!one! two! one! two! get inside! - one! two! welcome colonel, welcome! we refused to get ourdaughter married to his son..
..so he has gone crazy! look, look, he lookslike ravan when he laughs.. ..isn't it? brother, brother.. take your father to hospital..a mental hospital. ask the doctors togive him electric shocks! he has gone mad! now, you stop yourcomedy otherwise.. ..there will be a tragedy.
accept the proposal andset out on a pilgrimage with.. ..our relative. are you mad!i'll go for pilgrimage with him! if i could, i would chainhim outside the bungalow.. ..guard our house. so that at least hewould guard our bungalow. you sit here please.sit quietly. don't speak a word! not a word! let him speak! let him speak.
today his cawing seemsto me as cooing of a nightingale. because my son has donesuch a great job that.. ..if he hears, he'll be delighted. no! - why is she coming here? if you say anything now,colonel will not be delighted. in fact, he'll be furious. what is this going on? look at them,they are so shameless! you please calm down.you please keep quiet.
just a moment!you don't pacify me. move aside! brother, when i went out,you were shouting! daksha! bhikhi!pack our bags. we'll go back! now what happened?you've settled down here? you're happy here? you please calm down andsit here quietly otherwise.. ..a calamity will strike! let him speak! let him speak! why do you stop him!today is his last day of talking!
last day! what do you mean by that? one minute, wait! brother, pack yourbags and leave from here. go and live on the platform. the whole family can goto the platform and live there. if you miss the last train,you'll have to spend the night.. ..on the platform. you'llhave to sleep there whole night! we'll have to only spendthe night on the platform. but you'll have to commitsuicide under the train!
and if you comeunder a goods train.. ..you'll be choppedto pieces immediately! if you are run overby 'rajdhani' (train).. ..nothing will remain of you. what nonsense is he talking? he means,he has written a poem on the train. when did i write a poem?i don't know to write. i must have just scribbled! that is how you composedthe poem! - what!
scribbling!scribbling! scribbling! - shut up! only this is written so far. don't try to be over smart. tell me, what is this? this.. this.. - what is this? what is this?colonel, i'll tell you. the thing is that.. listen, how much everbrother wants to hear.. ..you don't tell him a word, okay?
and you are underthe oath of your son.. ..if you tell him anything. and you are under the oathof your grandson, if you don't! now he is insisting on it himself! i'll have to call both,a heart specialist and.. ..an orthopedic doctor. either someone willget a heart attack or.. ..someone's bones will break! you may call whoeveryou want to because..
..today i'll have to tellhim as he has put me under an oath. colonel, actually it is.. i'll tell him!- you'll tell him? - yes! you've done it!so you tell him. tell him. what is it? father has found the cordbut he can't find his pant! you're fooling me! so i'll go around without it.hold on.. he is lying. actually..
i'll tell. i'll tell. brother,there is so much space outside.. ..your bungalow, it wouldbe great if we grow vines there! do you find anything written here? do you think i am a fool? what is all this aboutvines and cord and pant? it is something else.tell me. come on, tell me. he really wants to listen!- tell me. actually, colonel..- don't tell him! - don't tell him!
actually, i am telling you..- don't tell him! don't tell him! don't tell him!don't tell him! don't tell him! shut up! they all are stopping me! iwon't be able to tell you, colonel. thank god! - now,i won't be able to tell you that.. ..rahul and sonalare already married. look, brother, i made a mistake. i told you what was not to be told.forgive me. but i'll not tell youanything further that..
..sonal is carrying rahul's child! say! say that all this is lie!say that they are telling lies! look, do you understandwhy i was refusing this marriage? look, look at them!how they are trying to defame you! that is why i was refusingto get you married to his son. say, dear,say that they are telling lies. say that all this is lie!say it! why don't you say anything! say it! - papa, it is true! it is true!
i trusted you so much!this is the reward you gave me! you betrayed me! you gaveme this reward for my love! don't vent out anger on her.accept this relationship. tell me!you knew this beforehand, right? no, i just cameto know sometime ago. but if i had known it,i too would have hidden it. i told you about rahul,so what did you do? you found out countlessways to stop their wedding! i am happy that thisgirl has got married.
i am very happy! you've gone mad!you're out of your senses! you know that i can'tstand his father! i'm not at all ready tohave a relationship with her. so we too haven't comehere with a wedding procession. he is just going on and on! we don't want toform any relationship. come, come, come on!let's get back to rotalpur! get lost! go away immediately!- no! no! brother jivtar!
don't go away! he is mad! if he is mad,take him to mental asylum, okay! i don't want to form anyrelationship with such a man! bhikhi! come on.we'll go back to rotalpur! come, dear. - listen! listen! don't.. don't even try it, okay? at present, it is the questionof your daughter's life! you are still blinded by your ego! yes, i'm blinded for sure!
children do make mistakes,but parents shouldn't further it! don't utter theseuseless adages, okay! colonel, do you remember,when sonal was small.. ..she used to be afraid of dark. you used to sit with heron your lap through the night! it is your duty, now, to see that.. ..her future doesn't get affected. go! if need arises,plead to brother jivtar. beg before him,but appease him, colonel.
you're right!you opened my eyes at right time! dear, you don't worry at all. your father will doanything for your sake! i'll not let your future be dark.you don't worry at all, dear. i'll talk to him.i'll talk to him. calm down. i'll talk to brother jivtar. come, come.it's time for the train. good bye!we are leaving. - brother jivtar! brother jivtar! brother jivtar!- i don't want to listen to you!
please listen to me.- now i want to leave. i don't want to listen to anything.- brother jivtar! i am sorry. look, please don't punishmy daughter for my mistake. i.. i beg of you. listen, if brother is appeasingso much, listen to him. but.. - i told you once! forget it! i'll forget it becauseshe is scolding me, okay! okay, i forgive you!- thank you, brother, thank you. but there is one condition.- condition?
yes. the same conditionof testing the relative. first, you tested me,now i'll test you! i'll test you if you deserveto be rahul's father-in-law. whether you deserveto be his son's grandfather. this relationship willlast only if you pass this test. otherwise divorce! "can't rely..can't rely on this relative." "wake up krishna,except you who will go to.." try it. you'll beable to sing one day.
enough! i've told youso many times, stop working. take rest for some days.but, you just go on! in the morning.. where is your master?call him here. hey colonel cucumber, come out! what's it? if you call out likethis in the middle of the exam.. ..how would one pass? we have to seethat you don't cheat. come on. show me.i had given my pant to wash.
have you washed it properly? have you washed it snow-white? he is as dark as a crow and yet.. ..he wants to wearsnow-white clothes! this is called tot for tit! what is that? what is that? make it tit for tot! tot! who taught you this english? your daughter.
my daughter hastaught this english? she must have taught what she knew! it's okay! it's okay! show me.have you washed my pant properly? i have washed it very nicely.i've beaten it well. show me! colonel,what have you done to my pant? you beat it so hard,you've turned it to a fringe! if i go out in this pant,what will the people say?
nagda (nude)! - what! anyway,your surname is nagda, right? my surname is nagda, i am not so! when you go out in this,you'll surely become so. jivtar nagda! how are you! father, when you go out in this,you'll look like.. ..helen who danced in suchclothes in 'sholay' (film). failed! you've failed in this exam! failed! i don't wantto give this exam! bye!
wait a moment! where are you going? come here. - what is it? you have to do a lot of work.here, take this. now, what is this? it's an important chit. he doesn't know to writeand he is giving me paper! oh! another chit!that means, two chits! who has to do all this work? - you? i have to do all this!
oh! sweeping, farming,cooking, washing, cleaning.. what is this? i have to all this? cooking? i'll do cooking? - yes! i'll not cook! bhikhi! pack your bags! no! no! let it be,sister bhikhi, let it be! i'll cook! i'll cook! listen to what you have to cook. what do i have to cook?
millet bread rollsand roasted eggplant. what did you say? are you out of your senses?roasted eggplant and all that.. i'll cook porridge and curry,you may have that. you have to prepareroasted eggplant. roasted eggplant! i've nevereaten eggplant in all my life! my wife kanchan likesit so much but still.. ..i've never cooked that. if you hold that roastedeggplant in your hand..
..it feels like you'reholding a rat in your hand! that is what you've to prepare! wait, i'll tell my wife.she'll be very happy. she will laugh at you! - go. go. kanchan.. - yes! father has lost his sense! why? what happened?- he is saying you have to cook. and do you knowwhat is to be cooked? eggplant! - yes!
i've made a mistake! i just love eggplant! but i haven't even tastedeggplant since 25 years. do you know, why? - why? because he doesn't like it. oh! you don't allow me to eat!at least allow me to speak. eggplant! eggplant! eggplant! i love eggplant, brother.- really? - yes. you don't worry.i'll serve you such eggplant that..
..you'll never forget its taste!- really! - yes. listen, what you have to cook. look, eggplant and potato,eggplant and bitter gourd.. ..eggplant and squash,eggplant and radish. - radish! eggplant and carrot,eggplant pudding.. ..eggplant sweet yoghurt,eggplant ice-cream and eggplant.. hey! he has fainted! make him snuff eggplant,he'll become conscious! oh! leave it! leave it!
people suffer fromchicken flu but.. ..he is sufferingfrom eggplant flu! hey, listen! where are you going? i told you, i am going to cook. before cooking,so much has to be done. he just doesn't know anything. haven't you taught him anything? first, you have todo sweeping and mopping. sweeping and mopping!i'll do that! - yes!
have you gone mad?i'm not going to do all that. bhikhi! - coming.. i'm doing! i'm doing!i'll do sweeping and mopping too. even gandhi has saidthat one must do his own work! kashi! - kashi will not do mopping. i'll do mopping.but do you have any objection if.. ..kashi brings the mop? no, i have no objection to that. and listen,the floor must be sparkling clean!
i'll have bath and come. i'll comb my hair lookingdown at the floor. now don't say anything further? he is a lousy fellow!he just doesn't know anything! give me. i'll mop thefloor quickly! - do it. sister kanchan!- oh! you had gone to take bath! there is no water there! what are you doing?you just started off! i knew you would cheat.
take rest for some days.take care of yourself. you've become thin as a stick. i've become thin as a stick?thank you! thank you! its dark everywhere! these females feel veryhappy if you flatter them! you get down to work! - yes! yes! he is relaxing again! he has gone mad!he thinks i'll do mopping! i'm a colonel! i'll do mopping!
the whole battaliondoes the job at my order! you have to this alsofor the daughter's welfare! you've learned itor you've loved it.. ..whatever way you may consider.. ..do the mopping, anyway! come on! papa, what are you doing? i was mopping the floor, dear. i've to mop the floorsparkling clean! - why? why! your father-in-lawhas given a test to me.
if i want to pass the test,if i want to get you married.. ..i'll have to do the mopping! enough, papa! that's enough! you don't need to pass any test. i've made the mistake.so i'll take the punishment. i'll give the test. - no, dear no! have you gone mad? i'll make you do all this chores? no, dear, if your father-in-lawsees you mopping the floor..
..he will fail me! and if i allow you to do this,as a daughter, i'll fail. no, dear, don't say that. it's not your mistake.it's my mistake. blinded by my ego,i never tried to understand.. ..your feelings. i bungled, dear. besides me, you can like someone.. ..you can love someone,i never thought of that. your father-in-law told me that..
..i've failed to pay attentionwhile fighting other battles. he is right.somewhere, i've failed as a father. no, papa! and let me take my punishment. it is my mistake. you haveto do all this because of me. no dear, don't cry.don't cry, dear. calm down!calm down! dear, if you cry.. ..my bank account willfall short by one million! you want to make your father poor!
no, isn't it? now smile. smile. you are my darling daughter. you look good when you smile.my doll! you don't worry. i'll mop the whole village!you just wait and see.. ..i'll mop the whole society! i've come to tell you the same. it will not sufficeto mop the house. you'll have to mop the street also.
you go.i'll do the mopping. you go. what is all this? wait there! where are you going? i want to talk to youabout something important. what is so important? i've fallen in love with daksha. i want to marry her.. if you agree. wow! wow!wow! you are my trump card! sister bhikhi! - sister kanchan!
what happened?why are you shouting? what can we do other than shouting? but at least tell me,what has happened? you are always worriedabout nonsense things! worry about her now!she goes haywire anywhere! how dare you love my daughter! you are absolutely right, friend! one must have couragelove your daughter. this is called tit for tat!
this is called god's justice,understood? your son swept offmy daughter in love and.. ..my son swept offyour daughter in love. it's equal!no more sweeping and mopping! very good, boy, very good! colonel, you are insulting me! oh! i'm insulting you!now you've realised it! if it is your son's affair,you call it love and if.. ..it is your daughter's affair,it is a scandal!
no, mr. nagda!these scandals won't work in.. ..today's time, understood? dear, you don't worry at all.if your father refuses.. ..i'll get you married. you just tell me whetheryou like this boy or not. daksha, don't say yes! daksha, don't say no! so what should i say? i'meven feeling embarrassed to say. daksha, daksha,you don't worry at all.
we'll deal with it in our own way. what will you do? if you deal with itin your own way, you think.. ..we'll keep quite? even if this villain refuses,i'll get you married at any cost. do you understand? come on!come on! now leave from here. don't wait. leave. hey, what are you waiting for?he's eloping with your sister!
hey! leave my sister's hand.i'll thrash you! hey! just shut up and sit down!nonsense! if you thrash her,how will he marry your sister? yes! - and whatare you waiting for? come on! come on!leave. go and get married. he will not elope. yourson has changed the party and.. ..he is with us now. i'm with them! - you traitor! you work with me,you live in my house and..
..you are supporting them! brother! son-in-law isbound to favour father-in-law. what do you mean?what is all this about? i mean, he has alreadyselected vijay for daksha. he has also agreedfor their marriage. this was your test! - yes! stupid! couldn't youtell your father-in-law? how would i tell?i didn't know about this test. rather than botheringabout your hair style..
..you should take care of all this. you have failed in this test!now, be careful in the next. otherwise divorce is inevitable. i'll be surely careful.- you listen to me.. - yes? i am telling you forget all this. now we'll immediately goback to our village rotalpur with.. ..our son and daughter-in-law! we'll immediately goback to our village rotalpur! do you have anytreasure buried there?
now it is the real testing time! now it will be more fun! i'll make thiscolonel sing lullaby. but i don't know to sing. i'll make him wash nappies! why should i wash nappies! colonel, i was thinkingsince long..- what? why is there no intimacybetween our families? why is it so?
because our surnamesare different! - so! so i have decided that you toowill accept our surname from today. from today, you'll be knownas colonel pranjeevan nagda! "now, look, how the colonel sinks! "how the life becomes.." rahul! how can you ask me to relax! both of our fathers don'tagree with each other at all! please, you talk slowly! why should i talk slowly, rahul!
this is enough now! i can not see my fatherbeing insulted more than this. this is enough! sonal! sonal! even i can't see it. sonal, they are hardonly on the surface. inwardly, they are very soft! we just need to crack the nut!please, be calm for sometime. and what if it doesn't work out? it will work out.please, you be calm for sometime.
no rahul. it's enough now.we'll talk to father. not now! sonal, just think! the shock of our marriage!the shock of your pregnancy! and now this! no sonal. we have come a great distance. now don't talk about backing out. we just have to go a step ahead. sonal, look, take it easy. once they accept our relation,we'll tell them about this also.
but, rahul, by that time.. you'll not say anything till then!please, have faith on me. i beg of you!- hey! disperse from here! rahul! how do i look? you look like naresh kanodia(gujarati film star) in.. ..amitabh bachchan's (megastarof bollywood) clothes! i know naresh kanodia,but, who is amitabh bachchan? what do i do? hey, girl! - yes?
where is your father? call him out. colonel cucumber! come out. i'll not come. no. bhikhi! - i'm coming! i'm coming, colonel, i'm coming! come on! come on! colonel, come on! why are you behavingas if you have nothing on? this is so loose!i'm feeling the chill in my brains! the whole of our villagewears such clothes!
do they wobble like this?stand straight! i feel as if i'm walkingon ramp in umbrella frock! there is at least enough space.this is so suffocating! take it off! rahul! - yes! in our village, people stitchquilt of old clothes. - yes. but people here,stitch clothes of quilt. have you finished laughing?did you enjoy? - we enjoyed! have i passed? - yes.
then i'll leave.- wait. it's not yet time to leave. colonel, in our village, thereis celebration for four-five days.. ..during wedding. - yes, yes, yes. this is my son's wedding!there will be celebration.. ..for 10-15 days.people will dance! we have to check if youcan dance as our relative! if you can't dance,it will spoil our reputation. so today i'll have tosee how you dance. - yes. put on a song,and you start dancing.
being in the company of his wife,he talks so much! bhikhi! - no! no! i'll not dance. he'll not dance!father, he'll not dance! bhikhi! - coming! his wife is ever ready with a pot! bhikhi! stand right there! as long as colonel continuesdancing, you'll stand there! just as he stops,you'll start towards the station! come on, dance!
bhikhi! come down! what are you doing?you know which songs i know. put on that cassette. father, he can't dance.. you move aside! you're ever ready to doa favour to your father-in-law! start the song! - start! "i'm a small child,the soldier of the country!" "sing with me. hail india!hail india! hail india!"
"hail india! hail india!" stop it! are you doing parade! i'll dance as i know! all this won't do. put onthe cassette which i've brought. and all of you listen! all of you have todance along with colonel. even if a singleperson doesn't dance.. ..i'll cut colonel's marks!i'll fail him! all of you dance. otherwiseyou won't be able to get married.
he has become adamant.dance as you can. who else has to dance? all of you. you,bhikhi, all of you! kanchan, all! sister bhikhi willalso dance? - yes. then it's okay.i think i'll be able to dance. come on! - start! he has put on a tape? yes, yes, evening in.. it's that damsel.. i know it!
"oh, damsel with lovely tresses,my beloved." come, dance with me. - "whomis your killing gaze searching?" i am not a damsel!- you are a charming guy! hey, sister kanchan..he'll hurt me.. you've learned it! "whom is your killinggaze searching for?" sister bhikhi,i'll have to do just like you. "why are you wanderingin each party?" come on!
"i'm looking for that stranger!i'm looking for that crazy!" "who has set me afire,i'm looking for that firefly!" wow! wow! "i've come wearing a long drape." "i've brought thesagas of my attitude!" "don't tease me, just stay away!" "she is bhikhi!" "i hail from una!" "the whole world has blossomed."
"the love has spread around." "my heart carves for you.i'm all yours." "i'm swept off my feet." "it's fun being in love!" "i saw you. i saw you.since the moment i saw you.." "i thought of nothing,i just fell in love." "i'm in love.i'm in love. i too am in love." "i've gone crazy.i've gone crazy, my dear." 'you're my love,my love, beloved, you're my love."
"you're my love." - "my love!my love!" "beloved, you're my love." hey! you just go on..my love! my love! brother jivtar, its okay.they are just children! it's okay! i danced, how did you like it?did i pass or not? wow! you danced so well! colonel, you danced so well that.. ..if the indian governmenthad known about it.. ..instead of sending thewhole battalion on the border..
..they would have sent you alone. why! why! if you would showyou dancing skill there.. ..the enemy would run awayleaving the conquered area. now their wedding is fixed, right?there will be no divorce, right? they will take divorce! what are you saying? brother did whateveryou asked him to do. he took all the teststhat you gave him.
now what is your problem? so does that mean thatwe must give away our son? brother, i thought you werejust fooling, so i supported you. the man who makes thewhole battalion dance.. ..to his tunes,readily danced to your tunes! the man who has neverbowed down to any one.. ..almost begged before you! there is no dearth ofprosperity in his house and.. ..yet he readily didsweeping and mopping!
what more do you want? i just cannot stand this man! father, you.. - you shut up! i don't want to formany relationship with him! first, he gave me a testwith the intention of failing me.. ..isn't it? - yes. that's it! i too gave him a testwith the intention of failing him! first, he watched the drama,now i'm watching the drama! it is tit for tat!
let's get back to rotalpur! but rahul.. forget about it! jivtar, i'll not spareyou' if you step out of my house! father, listen to me.i'll not give divorce to sonal! then i'll considerthat you are not my son! my son is dead for me!- rahul's father.. form the habit ofsaying daksha's father! get going!
bhikhi, you know that.. ..a shameless man holdsno respect in our village! i will not acceptthis relationship after.. ..being insulted like this! let me see who hasthe guts to stop me! come on!let's get back to rotalpur! sonal! leave me! - listen to me!mother is there inside! if you go inside,there will be more tension.
please, i beg of you! let me go to my daughter! - please! oh, god! please don't punishmy daughter for my crime. i'll never be ableto forgive myself if.. ..anything goes wrongwith my daughter. did you see? even an atheist is beggingbefore god for his daughter! hey, jeevtar! if anythinghappens to my daughter.. ..i'll not spare you!
how am i at fault? it was your gun, your bullet!you fired it! and you are blaming me! but you were being adamant! first, who talked about test? i had agreed finally, right?so why did you do this drama? that's great!if you do it, it's a miracle and.. ..if i do it, it's cheating!- but.. but.. - stop it!
my daughter has been hitby the bullet in all this fighting. sister kanchan..- even now you are fighting! i don't want to knowwho initiated or.. ..whose mistake it was. it is my daughter sonaland rahul's mistake! they loved each other,they got married but.. ..they didn't elope!that is their mistake! it is their mistake that.. ..they tried to persuadetheir stubborn parents!
it is their mistakethat more than their love.. ..they gave more importanceto their parents' esteem! i'll say that it's good,she has been hit by the bullet! she must get thepunishment for her mistake! and shoot 2-3 bullets at rahul too! so that no child will thinkof their parents' esteem in future! bhikhi, look at her,what is she saying? sister kanchan is right! you love your esteemmore than your son!
their love holds noimportance before your pride! that is why you saidthat you are dead for me! you are not my son! you are great, rahul's father!you have won! you have won the battleagainst sonal's father! you have won! - bhikhi, stop it! you should havestopped me long ago! colonel, i've made a mistake! forgive me, colonel, forgive me!
brother jivtar,crying doesn't suit you at all! you should always smile!in fact, it is not just your fault! even i am equally at fault!maybe i am more at fault! brother jivtar, i wasn'tso adamant since childhood! i wasn't so possessive!i had got my sister married! it was a love marriage! i had danced merrilyin her wedding! i had got her marriedwith great pomp and show! but the very next month ofher wedding i got a letter that..
..my sister had committed suicide. i wasn't ready to believe it!my sister couldn't do this! she made the whole worldjoyous with her smile! i went to court!i fought the case! i lost it! brother jivtar, i lost it! the very next monththat boy got married again! i couldn't do anything! what happened to my sister,shouldn't happen to.. ..my daughter!obsessed with this fear..
..i acted unjustlywith my daughter! it's not your fault,brother jivtar, it's my mistake. i wasn't so since childhood! i made a mistake! i made a mistake! brother jivtar,a daughter is an ocean of love! it must be allowed to flow freely! it shouldn't be shackled! i tried to shackle it wrongly! daddy, sonal is here.
sonal dear.. - sonal.. - sonal.. sonal dear, how are you now?are you alright? yes, the bullet justbrushed past me. i am fine. oh, god! i am so grateful to you! father, let sonal stay here.we'll go back to rotalpur. you stupid! you want to leavethis girl in such a condition.. ..and go away to rotalpur? we'll get you married immediately. there is no need for that. - what!
sonal is not pregnant! - what! yes. we are not even married! yes, we are not married! hey.. then why did you play act? because we love each other! but the values you inculcatedin us stopped us from eloping! wedding is not just theunion of two individuals.. ..it is a union of two families!
we had thought that we'll bringtwo different families together. but, we've failed in this test! father, let's go back to rotalpur. no, my son, no!no! you have not failed! we, elders have failed! we had forgotten thatyou have grown up now. you do have a life of your own! no, my son, you have not failed. both of you have passed. don't cry!
brother jivtar,i give permission for this wedding. i have no objection to it. who are you to give permission! i give my permission! okay, be it that way. but,listen, since my daughter's birth.. ..i had always wishedto have a live-in son-in-law. now your son will takeaway my daughter after wedding. so can i come to yourhouse as live-in father-in-law? all of them ran away!
"you can't rely on this relative!" oh, god!i am really grateful to you!
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